Really, bitch?

Somehow, Everything's gonna fall right into place,

I know, that at the end of the day, it's all for the best. That every trial and tribulation i face will be recompensed in dividends. That right now, there is a reason for you're being such a bitch and the repulsion you stir in me.

Perhaps it is for me to learn to better endure and deal with such people, or to learn other lessons...Perhaps it's to keep me away from my previous desires of you. But i know at the end of the day, it's all for my best interests.

Then why does it still sting like motherfucker?


If Only we had a way to make it all fall faster everyday...

I'm being tested, i know that. The time i spend in this state is part and parcel of the test and lesson. I everything will be alright in the end, but sometimes i wish we'd reach the end. Yes, sometimes i wish the pieces would fall faster everyday...

Then this nonsense would be over faster.

Holding onto patience, wearing thin...

I consider myself a patient man. I don't really panic or worry when things don't go according to plan because i know there's a reason for it. I don't get angry at most people because i understand what they do. But my patience has it's limits. And You, sweetheart, are pushing it. Make up your fucking mind.

Personally, i don't want to go to war, least of all with you...so why does it seem like that is what you want? Despite telling me one thing, your actions send different messages. You're like fucking Israel. Make up your mind, i'm tired of your bullshit.

I can't force these eyes to see the end...

Everything will be alright in the end. I know this for a fact. Yet i can't see the end and to some extent, it adds to my frustration. I know we'll get to where we're meant to be in the end, but these eyes can't see the end. I suppose it is a test of my faith, and the fact is that my faith still stands.

You are filling the role that so many others before have filled, and i wonder to myself, what is Allah trying to teach me. Why the need for this roleplayer in my life? I know that unless i figure it out, i'll never be rid of you...never be rid of people like you who bring so much heartache into my life.

This time we're not giving up
Let's make it last forever

The song's resonance has proven prophetic. Like words written from my own thoughts, a reminder of what i need to keep in mind through this whole fucked-up episode. But what do these last 2 lines mean? I can only guess. Allah has something in store for me, but what?

Whatever it is, i know i'm sick and tired of you. You once said i became disgusting to you, well, guess what: I'm sick of you. Fucking sick and fucking tired of your nonsense. Disgusted with your immaturity and hypocrisy.

Yes bitch, i'm angry. You have 2 days, decide war or peace. I'm not settling for the shit that we have now.

Break my fall

Break My Fall,
I found what was missing inside you

Could this really be me? Issuing plaintiff cries like a child lost in the darkness...

It's been months now, and it's fucking sickening. The feeling of my heart being compressed, slowly crushing my will to do anything.

This is NOT me, this is NOT who i'm supposed to be. I'm not ready to give up, i'm not ready to give in. I'm not ready to die.

Fuck You, I'm flying with or without you.